Inspired by a Facebook viral, but more!

1. I took tennis and bowling in college.

2. I can't speak, read, or write Japanese anymore.

3. I like the way skunks smell.

4. I used to think it was impressive that I had a book still overdue from 1999, but now that I'm fully versed in the ways libraries work, I realize they don't even know they're missing it.

5. Freshly made flour tortillas are, perhaps, the perfect food.

6. I'm closed minded, but I don't think there's a problem with that because I'm right most of the time.

7. I don't notice a lot of things.

8. My son is the greatest human being ever born. This is provable scientifically.

9. I once had an ingrown toenail that is now the stuff of legend... an infamous kind of legend.

10. I like beer.

11. I have 3 dogs, with a total of 11 legs.

12. I participated in high school academic contests with hangovers.

13. I think the easiest way to do something is probably the best way to do something.

14. I play animal crossing... wow that's hard to admit.

15. I am not a good driver. In fact, I wish I never had to drive at all.

16. I'm not a very good writer either.

17. I have an opinion on just about everything, but that's only because I've thought about it already.

18. If there was a profession where people would pay me just to point out their faults (without offering any solutions) I would be the Frank Lloyd Wright of it.

19. I firmly believe that everyone peaks at some point and we shouldn't listen to the doom and gloom warnings of old people.

20. I am, and always have been, bad at spelling.

21. I went several years of my life without owning a vacuum cleaner. Don't worry, we've got one now. If you knew my wife, you would definitely know she married me in spite of my (ex) tendencies to slobbery.

22. My wedding day was HOT! It was good that there was a lot of beer. I think 95% of people there would agree on that.

23. I think my wedding is the best wedding I've ever been to.

24. Oh yeah, I'm pretty arrogant, but that's nothing new to anyone, really, is it?

25. I rarely know what day it is until I look at a calendar, and then I don't know what I've got scheduled for tomorrow.

26. I have attended 7 colleges and universities and have only 2 degrees.

27. I love low scoring baseball games- where every pitch and every swing, stolen base, or error can cost you the game.

28. I have worn cologne before, but I don't as a general rule now.

29. I like what Voltaire had to say, but I can't shake the feeling that if I was sent back in time- with a fluent understanding of period French- I would want to punch him in the face after about 5 minutes of conversation.

30. Not to offend, but I believe that 90% of the world population is stupid, but the problems arise from the 86% of them that don't know it.